3.30.2012

What Not To Wear: The Wrestling Edition #1: Eve Torres

It's time to start a new feature on the Majesty of Wrestling. And after thinking about this a while, I came to the realization that the best thing that could be done was to fix the problems we see on big-box wrestling every week. But how to do that? I'm not qualified to be a writer for the 'E (although considering some of the crappy storylines they've been putting out recently, I may need to rethink this opinion.) I can't teach people how to wrestle. So what to do then? Easy. Fix the gear of some people who desperately need it.




But I alone can't do this. So I need help. Who did I go to, you ask? Clinton Kelly? Child, please. Stacy London? Absolutely not. I went to one of my best friends online and off, Yolanda from http://www.gimickswrestlingtees.com/. Her t-shirt designs are awesome, and I should know since I own a small handful. Also, she's super-fine and I figure if I have to do this I should do it with someone whose company I actually enjoy.


(Hey,Hey,Hey everybody it's Yolanda and it is my pleasure to give my professional advice and tips on how these wrestlers should dress or even if I think it's hot or not!)


Every week this diva comes on television, and every single week we notice 2 things. 1: She can't wrestle (or isn't given the chance)  in anything longer than 2-3 minute bursts. 2: Her fashion sense is terrible.

Haha Okori, Now for a while I hated how Steve... I mean Eve Tores. , but dress, but I must admit now that she's a hoe, she dresses 10 x's better! See when she was a flat ass, unbooty poppin baby face her style was so whack and cheap. But now as a gold diggin Zack Ryder hoe, she looks expensive and her style as evolve shood even her weave looks good! Heck I even like her gear now.

The funny thing about this, Yolanda, is that in a lot of ways this is an issue with the WWE's writing staff. When she was the flat-assed babyface no one in the WWE had any significant idea how to make her look like anything except Kelly Kelly's best friend. She was even presented in that way as like a Latina Kelly Kelly, right down to skimpy gear and general attempts to make us believe that she was sexy because she wore poom-poom shorts. As soon as she became Evil Eve (the template they've done since the famously hot Evil Trish turn) it's like they let her dress herself. But the question is this: Yolanda, the stylish one amongst the two of us, what would you do to make Eve look even better? I can't wait to hear this.

Ya know I really wanted to say something funny, but I got to keep it real, I wouldn't change a thing right now, I really like how she dresses.  She look's like a well dressed gold digger.  So I'll say keep up the good hoe work. Now asked me this question again a little later and I'll probably say that gurl looks tore up from the floor up!

Thank you again, Yolanda, and we are going to make this a regular feature. I promise.

1 comment:

Jay Obeck said...

Its great to know what not to wear on wrestling. I think that it would be great to have the proper outfit on doing wrestling. I know that many people are also interested on what are the different outfit that suits them well.